If you could ask a woman the worst thing their partner could do to them, I’d bet a few coins that majority would say “cheating”. Finding out that your partner has been unfaithful is heart-breaking, devastating and can ruin a woman’s self esteem,as well as affecting her future relationships.
But what happens when the tables are turned? Does cheating have the same effects on men as it has on women?
Well, in 2018 women are savages. This is the age of feminism and technology. Sometimes it’s not even about revenge. You could treat a woman like a queen, worship her but she will still cheat on you. It doesn’t matter if you buy her expensive hair, bags, clothes.. That shit sometimes don’t count. Kama ni wa kupeana, atapeana tu. The statistics of women cheating have increased. We don’t cry, cut our hair and wallow in depression when we get hurt. We pierce our titties, change wardrobes, work out and revenge. No mercy. Mercy is for the weak. Women of today cheat back so ruthlessly that when a guy finds out he becomes a motivational speaker and goes to church. These streets are no longer one-sided. They are mean messy and only the strong and heartless survive. It’s literally a blood bath, a bloody battle of the sexes. And if you ask me, the women are totally in control. Yes, the future is female.
So just for clarity, I did a little research. I just had to give the facts, no make up stories. I asked a few women why they think women cheat: the factors that lead them to cheat and if personally they’d ever cheated on their partner. Here are the responses;
“For a woman who is being treated right to cheat it’s because of emotional neglect. Women are emotional. A man has to be there for me emotionally, not just buying me stuff to keep me happy. He has to notice my emotional flactuations and talk to me. Also, inconsistency is a turn off. “
“Besides lust, women cheat because of disconnection. It gets to a point when you feel psychologically distant and the passion that was blazing at the initial stages of dating waxes cold. This happens when the couple starts to take each other for granted after feeling ‘complete’ and ignoring the little things they did that drew them together. This results in one party seeking to be wanted, loved and needed. However, some cases of cheating are as a result of lust, revenge or just lack of seriousness in a relationship. “
“Cheating may occur when you have a partner who provides, cares, comes home early but you still feel that there’s something missing. That there may be some things you like doing but he finds them boring… Like going out for dinner, movies, double dates with friends, roadtrips. Then you stumble upon a colleague at the office who is into all that stuff and you hit it off. Or maybe your boyfriend is a great guy but he doesn’t satisfy you sexually, you might get the temptation to cheat. “
“Communication is key in every relationship so when it’s not there, cheating occurs. When you get compliments or attention from another guy, it’s bound to happen”
“Women cheat because of bitterness, betrayal and revenge, because sometimes she sacrifices alot only to end up being played”
“Chris Brown said it,.. “when a rich nigga wants you, and your nigga can’t do nothing for you… “
Also, small dick problems, curiousity, adventure, emotional unavailabilty and distance. “
“A woman cheats either because the man is not good in bed or not romantic at all, or sometimes just to get back at her unfaithful partner. “
“We cheat because we dont get satisfied with what we have. God gave us good eyebrows but we still shave them off and draw our own, so who does a man think he is?? “
“A woman cheats for attention, money, for fun and also sometimes to have something to compare to”
“Women like to love and be loved back, so if you treat her right, buy her stuff but she gets someone who does actually pays attention to her, she will cheat”
“Lack of attention mostly, and sometimes of the guy is poor in bed”
“I think women cheat because they decide to. Cheating is a choice. You really don’t need a reason to. Because haven’t we seen women in bad relationships but have remained faithful? And have we not seen those who have everything life can possibly offer;good husband, amazing children, money but still go ahead and cheat? Personally, I don’t believe in cheating. I have dated twice and never cheated. However, I cannot rule out that some circumstances can push a woman to cheat; curiousity, lust, loneliness and revenge”
In the African society, cheating is frowned upon for women. Our African culture demands that women should not express their sexual desires or talk openly about sex. Women are meant to be perfect, loyal and submissive to their men. Fast forward to the 21st century, women are tired of this bullshit. We don’t want to conform to this image anymore, especially because it oppresses us. Don’t you think that this notion that a woman should stay with her man even if he is hurting her is total bullshit? Have we not seen women who are battered being adviced to stick to their men and forgive them?? Its disgusting, really. Women now want to explore, experiment and be more independent.
Cheating is even easier in this social media age. The possibilities to connect with people readily and covertly has expanded. The variety of apps that hide, encrypt or delete messages and pictures on our phones make it simpler for a cheater to cover their dirty tracks. For women, it starts off innocent, and emotionally. As I have proven, women are needy creatures. They need attention. And a woman uses emotional cheating as a defense mechanism, a sort of back up just incase her main relationship crumbles. You have heard of that “He’s just a friend excuse”. But eventually when you slack off, when you miss the littlest of details, a shoulder to cry on becomes a dick to ride on. This is the type of woman to move on faster when y’all break up, because she had another man to fall back on.
I don’t condone cheating. And I don’t think it should be normalized and celebrated either. It’s humiliating and horrible. Most cases, (most, not all), a woman is driven into it. And for this particular reason I have a remedy for the fellas. Those other reasons ati money, fun, adventure.. That is just pure malice. Those type of bitches need prayers. So here’s my two cents. Don’t ever think that money and expensive stuff keeps or gets you a woman. If you have to use money to get her, she’s not the one for you. Because she will eventually leave you for another richer nigga. A real woman is gonna love you regardless. A real woman just wants your attention and affection more. Shower your woman will affection and give her your time, and she will be yours forever. For this type of woman, it’s the little things that matter. Notice when she gets a new hairdo, a new nail colour, or lipstick shade. If she looks good, tell her. Never give another man that chance.
And I think the difference between men and women in terms of cheating is that, for men it’s all about opportunity. Women could have endless opportunities but they will still need motivation to do it. If a man gets a party and spots a fine girl, that is the perfect opportunity to hit. Also, men get into it with their mind. It’s usually not easy to get attached, but for women sometimes it’s with a guy that could potentially replace you.
So, there you have it gents. Don’t go around running your mouth all over cursing out all women just because you got what you deserved. Deal with the monsters you created in private.